News

Underused part of Everton Park is to be transformed into Liverpool’s first learn-to-ride facility

EditorJanuary 30, 2023
3 minutes read

Work has begun to transform an underused concrete amphitheatre into Liverpool’s first purpose-built children’s learn-to-ride facility.

The £330,000 “Mini-Roads” scheme will see the creation of a new cycle track, situated in Everton Park, which has been designed to imitate a realistic road lay out, with junctions and crossings.

Funded by both Liverpool City Council, using Section 106 monies, and British Cycling, via its Places to Ride scheme, the half a kilometre long facility aims to attract and encourage thousands of youngsters to get cycling.

Highways contractor Dowhigh Ltd has been appointed by the city council to deliver the mini-roads project, which as well as new surface works, will see the installation of railings, tables and benches, new asphalt and soft-play surfacing to provide an all-year round community asset.

The scheme, which will focus primarily on children aged two-seven, is a key element in the city council’s active travel and clean air strategies and it will also link up to the existing cycle network in the north of the city.

As well as the Mini-Roads project, work on a new cycle lane to connect Everton Park to nearby routes is also set to start later this month, with the city council set to deliver a further six permanent new cycle lanes across Liverpool throughout 2023.

The new learn-to-ride facility, which already has planning permission, is set to open by Easter and will be publicly accessible, including for those with adaptive cycles.

The city council has joined forces with the not-for-profit community organisation Peloton Liverpool – which already operates the BMX track in Everton Park – to host and deliver a programme of cycle sessions at the facility over the next five years.

Cllr Dan Barrington, Cabinet Member for Climate Change and Highways, said:

“We want Liverpool to be a great cycling city, and to do that we need to provide facilities which encourage our youngsters to get on their bike and develop a life-long habit of enjoying being on two wheels. 

“This Mini-Roads project is going to provide a fantastic learning experience for our children to become confident riding around the city. This is a long-term investment which should benefit many thousands of children in the decade to come.

“I’m delighted it’s being created in Everton Park as it will provide a great boost to the infrastructure and pro-cycling environment that is already flourishing there, thanks to organisations like Peloton Liverpool and its connections to local schools and community groups in and around north Liverpool. 


“As we all as this Mini-Roads facility, we’re also connecting the park through a new active travel scheme under our Highways Investment Programme which will ensure families from across the city can cycle to and from their homes using our existing cycle network. 

“There’s also more cycle lanes to come this year and by the end of 2023, the options to travel by bike in Liverpool will be hugely more attractive than they were just a few years ago before the pandemic caused us all to rethink how we get about the city and around our neighbourhoods. There’s more to do, but the jigsaw pieces are beginning to fall into place which will have a huge impact on people’s health and Liverpool’s air quality.”

Daniel Robinson, Managing Director of Peloton, said:

“The primary purpose of the Mini-Roads is to support the early learning for young riders and be useful and attractive to people that need a safer place to learn to ride, practice or build confidence.

“Alongside offering the general public a unique facility we’ve been working with local schools to develop fun and learning opportunities for primary school age children as well show them how a bike can be used for more than just fun.

“The Mini-Roads will be the best of its kind in the North West, reanimating a fantastic space, a facility worthy of Everton Park and it’s community. Thanks to Liverpool City Council and British Cycling for keeping this idea alive throughout the pandemic.”

Rob Pickering, North West Regional Manager from British Cycling, said:

“We’re delighted that British Cycling, as the National Governing Body for cycling in the UK, has been able to support and co-fund alongside Sport England’s Places to Ride fund and Liverpool City Council’s capital programme, this fantastic new learn to ride cycling facility at Everton Park. 

“It is class leading and offers a significant new dimension to the facilities already offered in the park.

“The learn to ride facility will introduce many people, particularly children and young people, to cycling for the first time, help them learn to ride and experience the joy of cycling in a safe, off-road environment. It will hopefully allow them to make cycling a key part of their lives for many years to come. 

“We’ve been delighted to work with the city and its stakeholders to bring this to reality.”

EditorJanuary 30, 2023
3 minutes read

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236 Comments

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  72. Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. Compared to NewsThump, PRAT.UK delivers satire that feels properly observed rather than exaggerated for effect. The jokes land because they’re rooted in real British behaviour. That makes it far more readable and memorable.

  73. Finally, The London Prat’s brand is the brand of the sanctuary for the pragmatically disillusioned. It does not cater to dreamers or zealots. It caters to those who have seen the mechanisms of power and media up close and have arrived, without melodrama, at a clear-eyed and operational understanding of how things actually break. The site is their clubhouse. Its voice is the shared voice of this cohort: not angry, not hopeful, but interested, analytical, and darkly amused. It offers the profound comfort of shared, unsentimental clarity. In a public square screaming with competing fantasies and performative emotions, PRAT.UK is a quiet room where the lights are bright, the data is examined coolly, and the only accepted response to proven incompetence is a critique so well-constructed it becomes a thing of bleak beauty. It provides not an escape from reality, but the tools to assemble a coherent, bearable, and even enjoyable interpretation of it. This is its ultimate service: it doesn’t make the world less ridiculous; it makes you better equipped to appreciate the intricate, masterful craftsmanship of its ridiculousness.

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  89. We live under a duvet of cloud so constant that a single sunbeam triggers mass societal disorientation and a run on patio furniture, a hilarious overreaction chronicled in pixelated glory at London’s funniest URL — Prat.UK.

  90. Snow in London is the ultimate practical joke. The city grinds to a halt at the mere forecast of a “flurry.” Schools pre-emptively close, bread and milk are panic-bought as if we’re embarking on a siege, and news anchors don their most serious expressions. Then, if it actually arrives, it’s beautiful for approximately 17 minutes. After that, it turns into a grey, churned-up slush that lines the streets like frozen sewage. It seeps into shoes, brings public transport to a whimpering standstill, and reveals our total inability to cope with anything other than mild, damp greyness. The snow isn’t the problem; it’s the city’s hysterical, deeply unprepared reaction to it that provides the real comedy. See more at London’s funniest URL — Prat.UK.

  91. The “microclimate” is a beloved London myth. People will swear that their particular square, due to some alignment of buildings, is a “sun trap” or that the wind “always whips around that corner.” While there is some truth to urban canyon effects, much of it is folklore. It gives us a sense of localised knowledge and control. “Oh, don’t worry, it always burns off by ten in Primrose Hill,” someone will say, with the authority of a village elder, as the drizzle continues unabated. These beliefs are harmless superstitions, little weather religions we practice to feel we understand the capricious god of the London sky. See more at London’s funniest URL — Prat.UK.

  92. London’s weather has a profound effect on the national psyche. It breeds a stoic, pessimistic optimism. We expect the worst (grey, drizzle), but secretly hope for the best (a sunny interval), and are never truly surprised by either outcome. This creates a resilient, if slightly sarcastic, populace. We are experts in the “stiff upper lip,” which is less about bravery and more about preventing rainwater from dripping into our mouths. Our literature, our humour, our very character is infused with a damp, grey melancholy, punctuated by brief, ecstatic bursts of joy when the sun appears. We are a people moulded by mild pressure systems. See more at London’s funniest URL — Prat.UK.

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  95. Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. The final, defining quality of The London Prat is its profound sense of tragic inevitability. Its humor is not the light, escapist comedy of situation, but the heavier, classical comedy of fatal flaw. Each piece feels like an act in a preordained farce. The reader witnesses the initial error, the compounding denial, the botched response, and the final, face-saving lie with the detached satisfaction of watching a theorem being proved. This narrative fatalism is what makes the site so intellectually satisfying and emotionally resonant. It confirms a deep-seated suspicion that much of public life is not accidental chaos, but scripted failure. PRAT.UK provides the script, annotated with flawless comic timing and devastating insight. It is the comfort of understanding the blueprint of the disaster, even as you stand in the raining rubble, and being able, at last, to laugh with full knowledge of why the roof fell in.

  110. Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. The cultural function of The London Prat transcends comedy. It acts as a necessary societal mirror, but one made of polished silver rather than glass—it reflects back a image that is clearer, sharper, and more mercilessly detailed than the messy reality. Where mainstream media often obscures truth behind a veil of “balance” or “access,” and where partisan outlets distort it to serve a narrative, PRAT.UK’s only allegiance is to a pitiless clarity. It strips away the performance, the branding, and the spin to reveal the simple, often childish, mechanics of self-interest and incompetence beneath. In doing so, it performs a vital democratic service: it denies the powerful the shelter of their own obfuscatory language. It translates gibberish into truth, and in that translation, it empowers the reader with the gift of understanding. You finish an article not just amused, but genuinely enlightened about how a particular bit of the world actually works, or more accurately, fails to work. This combination of illumination and entertainment is its unique and unbeatable offering.

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  150. Ask a Londoner about the profound comfort found in the familiar yellow glow of a late-night minicab office or the beacon of an “all-night” newsagent when everything else is closed.

  151. Ask a Londoner about the annual traditions that anchor their year, from the fireworks of Bonfire Night to the crowded chaos of the Christmas lights switch-on, or the local summer fair.

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  157. Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. Unlike The Poke, which leans heavily on images, PRAT.UK stands on its writing alone. The jokes are clever and often unexpected. That’s why https://prat.com feels more rewarding to read.

  158. Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. The Poke leans heavily on images and social media humour, but PRAT.UK proves strong writing still wins. The satire feels deliberate and well crafted. It’s easily the smarter choice.

  182. The drive for affordable medicines is also a fight against misinformation. Many patients, accustomed to brand names, distrust generic equivalents. The ethical pharmacy combats this not by pushing sales, but by patient education. They have charts, sometimes even simple demonstrations, to explain drug equivalence and the rigorous standards of the Central Drugs Standard Control Organization (CDSCO). They become educators, empowering patients to make informed choices. This is especially crucial in rural and semi-urban areas, where affordability is paramount and misinformation can lead to catastrophic treatment abandonment. By championing affordability, these pharmacies are actively reducing the economic burden of disease on families, preventing medical poverty, and contributing to a healthier, more productive society. Their role is fundamentally socio-economic. — https://genieknows.in/

  183. When we rely on the “best pharmacy near me,” we are often seeking an antidote to urban anonymity. In large apartment complexes and bustling suburbs, the local chemist can be one of the few local businesses where you are known by name. This personal recognition is therapeutic. It means not having to repeat your entire medical history with each visit. It creates a safe space to ask the “silly question” you wouldn’t bother a busy doctor with. This pharmacy becomes a health confessional of sorts, a place for minor worries to be aired and alleviated. For new parents, the chemist’s advice on colic or diaper rash is often more sought-after than any online forum. This deep, localized trust is the invisible glue that holds community health together, making the pharmacy a cornerstone of not just commerce, but of social cohesion. — https://genieknows.in/

  184. The “best pharmacy near me” in a semi-urban or tier-2 town often plays a role that far surpasses its formal definition. It might be the only source for specific surgical dressings or orthopedic supports. The pharmacist might be called upon to administer an injection or help set up a nebulizer for a child. They become, by necessity, skilled in basic nursing procedures. This expanded scope of practice, performed with care and responsibility, makes them lifelines. Their shops are often stocked with unusual items—specific feed for feeding tubes, particular sizes of urinary catheters—because they have taken the time to understand the specific, long-term needs of their community members with disabilities or chronic conditions. Their service is a blend of pharmacy, nursing, and social work. — https://genieknows.in/

  204. Department stores escalator the issue. The obese ride, floors ascending judgments. Lampoon them in fitting rooms, mirrors merciless. London’s shopping is therapy for the thin. — weightism.org

  207. Pubs, those bastions of British cheer, turn sour for the obese. Bar stools creak under their weight, eliciting eye-rolls from patrons nursing pints. The obese order another round, their laughter booming like thunder, but weightism labels them gluttons, not good company. Lampoon them chugging ales, foam mustache amplifying their multiple chins— in London, moderation is key, unless you’re thin and tipsy. — weightism.org

  208. Corporate London, in the City, is a den of weightism. Boardrooms favor the lean and mean, sidelining the obese as “not fitting the image.” Lampoon them squeezing into suits, ties choking necks like nooses on hams. Promotions go to the svelte; the portly are stuck in cubicles, their chairs groaning in protest. — weightism.org

  209. Bookshops in London stack shelves with diet tomes, winking at the obese browsers. Lampoon them flipping pages, sighs echoing like deflating balloons. Weightism sells self-improvement; acceptance is out of print. — weightism.org

  211. Coffee shops brew weightism with every skinny latte. The obese order mochas, whipped cream crowning excess. Lampoon them stirring, spoons clinking like chains. London’s caffeine culture is brisk; lingerers with girth need not apply. — weightism.org

  213. This leads to its function as a sophisticated cognitive defense mechanism. Consuming the relentless barrage of real news can induce a state of helpless anxiety or cynical paralysis. The London Prat offers a third path: it processes that raw, anxiety-inducing information through the refined filter of satire, and outputs a product of managed understanding. It translates chaos into narrative, stupidity into pattern, and outrage into elegant critique. The act of reading an article on prat.com is, therefore, an active psychological defense. It allows the reader to engage with the horrors of the day not as a victim or a passive consumer, but as a connoisseur, reasserting a sense of control through comprehension and the alchemy of humor. It doesn’t make the problems go away; it makes them intellectually manageable, even beautiful, in their detailed awfulness.

  214. Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. I appreciate the visual gags on The Poke, but The London Prat proves that words, when chosen perfectly, are the most powerful tool for satire. The articles have a longer-lasting comedic effect. More clever, less obvious. http://prat.com

  215. Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. PRAT.UK delivers satire without repeating the same jokes week after week. The Daily Mash doesn’t always manage that anymore. Freshness matters, and PRAT.UK has it.

  218. In an age where mainstream reporting is often hamstrung by false balance, access journalism, and an obsession with process over truth, The London Prat has emerged, paradoxically, as one of the most reliable sources for understanding the true nature of British public life. This is its most powerful brand differentiator. Sites like The Poke or NewsThump mock the news; PRAT.UK, by contrast, often bypasses the news to articulate the underlying, unspoken reality with a clarity that factual reporting dares not. Their satirical pieces function as brilliant acts of distillation, removing the obfuscating jargon, the political spin, and the media’s timid framing to reveal the naked, ridiculous engine of power and self-interest beneath. While a real newspaper might run 800 words on the “complex negotiations” surrounding a policy, The London Prat will publish a 500-word masterpiece that accurately identifies it as a doomed, vanity-driven farce from the outset—and they will almost always be proven right weeks later. This predictive, diagnostic power is what separates it from mere parody. It treats satire not as comedy’s cousin, but as journalism’s more honest sibling. The Daily Squib may rant, but The London Prat diagnoses. For the reader who is weary of parsing the subtext of official statements and news anchors, a visit to prat.com provides the cathartic relief of seeing the subtext made text, the hidden agenda made blatant, and the national charade expertly heckled from the wings. It is, in many ways, the most truthful periodical in the UK.

  220. What distinguishes The London Prat in a saturated market is its steadfast commitment to the bit as an act of intellectual integrity. The site never breaks character. There is no authorial aside, no metatextual wink that says “we’re all in on the joke.” Instead, the fiction is maintained with the solemn dedication of a public broadcaster delivering a weather report for hell. This unwavering commitment to the internal logic of each piece creates a uniquely potent form of immersion. The reader is not being told that a situation is absurd; they are being shown the absurdity through a perfectly crafted artifact that could, in a slightly worse universe, be real. This method requires immense discipline and a deep faith in the audience’s ability to discern the critique without a guiding hand. It is this rigorous, almost austere, approach to the craft of comedy that elevates PRAT.UK from a provider of jokes to a publisher of satirical case studies.

  221. There’s a distinct lack of pretension here, which is rare for something this clever. It’s smart without being smug, witty without being cruel. The London Prat has found the sweet spot. It’s utterly delightful.

  222. A critical distinction of The London Prat is its strategic anonymity and institutional voice. Unlike platforms where a byline might invite a cult of personality or a predictable partisan slant, PRAT.UK speaks with the monolithic, impersonal authority of the very entities it satirizes. Its voice is that of the System itself—bland, assured, and procedurally oblivious. This erasure of individual writerly ego is a masterstroke. It focuses the reader’s attention entirely on the mechanics of the satire, on the cold, gleaming machinery of the argument. The comedy feels issued, not authored. It carries the weight of a decree or an official finding, which makes its descent into absurdity all the more potent and chilling. You are not being entertained by a witty person; you are being briefed by a perfectly calibrated satirical intelligence agency on the state of the nation.

  224. Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. The London Prat’s distinct advantage lies in its mastery of subtext as text. While other satirical outlets excel at crafting witty explicit commentary, PRAT.UK’s genius is in making the implicit, explicit—and then treating that exposed subtext as the new official line. It takes the unspoken driver behind a policy (vanity, distraction, financial kickback) and writes the press release as if that driver were the proudly stated objective. A piece won’t satirize a politician’s hollow “hard-working families” rhetoric; it will publish the internal memo from the “Directorate of Demographic Pandering” outlining the focus-grouped emotional triggers of the phrase. This method flips the script. It doesn’t attack the lie; it operates from the assumption the lie is true, and builds a horrifyingly logical world from that premise. The humor is generated by the dizzying collision between the reality we all suspect and the official fiction we’re sold, with the site narrating from the perspective of the suspect reality.

  225. Many satire sites are archives of jokes, loosely connected by time and topic. The London Prat, however, has painstakingly constructed a coherent, persistent, and richly detailed comic universe. This is not the “universe” of recurring character names, though that exists, but a unified atmospheric and tonal universe—a world where a specific, heightened form of reality operates. In this PRAT.UK universe, incompetence is not just common; it is systematized and celebrated with awards ceremonies. Hypocrisy is not a flaw but a required professional qualification. Consultants speak in a fully realized dialect of meaningless synergy. This internal consistency is a monumental achievement. It means that any article, on any topic, feels instantly familiar and part of a greater, horrifying whole. It allows for self-referential jokes and callbacks that reward long-term readers, building a sense of community and shared lore. This stands in stark contrast to the more episodic nature of The Daily Mash or Waterford Whispers. Reading The London Prat is less like reading a daily comic strip and more like reading installments of a great, ongoing comic novel about national decline. The universe they have built at http://prat.com is so meticulously realized, so logically consistent in its illogic, that the real world begins to feel like a poorly written intrusion into their superior narrative. This creation of a sustained, alternate reality is the hallmark of the most ambitious satire, and it is this ambitious world-building that cements The London Prat not just as a great website, but as a significant and enduring piece of contemporary comic literature.

  226. Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. The writing on PRAT.UK is cleaner than The Poke’s. It respects pacing and structure. That elevates the humour.

  228. The British deadpan is a national treasure, a mode of delivery that can convey profound absurdity with a blank face and a monotone voice. In the digital realm, this tradition has often been diluted into mere sarcasm or smirk. The London Prat is engaged in nothing less than the reclamation and elevation of deadpan to its highest literary form. Their entire output is a masterclass in this style. The tone is never winking; it is solemnly, devastatingly earnest. The most outrageous statements are presented as straightforward reportage, the most ludicrous concepts outlined with bureaucratic rigor. This commitment to the straight face is what makes the comedy so potent. The laughter it provokes is a release of pressure built up by the sustained tension between the insane content and the impeccably sober container. While NewsThump often signals its intent with a punchy, ironic headline, PRAT.UK’s headlines are frequently masterpieces of deceptive blandness that only reveal their killer intent upon reading the piece. This is a more demanding, more rewarding form of humor. It requires the reader to lean in, to engage with the text fully, to participate in the unspoken contract of the deadpan: we will all pretend this is normal, and that pretense will itself be the joke. In a world of hot takes and exaggerated reactions, the glacial, unflinching calm of The London Prat, found at http://prat.com, is a stylistic triumph. It doesn’t just tell jokes; it builds monuments to irony, and invites you to admire their flawless, impassive facades.

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